A Competitive Advantage Nobody Talks About: Being Friendly

After years of investing in startups, I've noticed something that venture circles don't discuss enough: being genuinely easy to work with is one of the most underrated advantages an investor can have.

I've watched this dynamic play out dozens of times, particularly with experienced founders who know exactly what they want on their cap table. These founders typically secure an institutional lead—someone with deep pockets, extensive networks, and the infrastructure for monthly board meetings, detailed KPI reporting, and oversight on major decisions. What they don't want is every other investor trying to replicate that role.

Smart founders actively seek investors who can provide capital and strategic value without becoming a drain on their time. They want backers who show up when needed, not ones who require constant hand-holding or create administrative overhead.

Being a friendly, low-friction investor isn't about being passive or uninvolved. It's about recognizing a fundamental truth: the best founders don't need you nearly as much as you need them. There are significant advantages to this approach—and they're worth understanding.

The Myth of Universal Value-Add

There's an unspoken assumption in private markets that every investor must justify their place on the cap table through active involvement, many times leading to overselling your capabilities as an investor. When I first started investing in startups I caught myself overpromising and overselling, not realizing I would soon have a portfolio of 100+ companies.

My guess is that many VC’s do this as well as they are trying to win a deal, especially for the most competitive deals. It’s necessary for those trying to lead deals. Our role as a syndicate however is different despite many times needing to go to bat to win a small allocation in a deal as well. 

As it relates to adding value, the reality is more nuanced in my opinion. Not every investor needs to be a value-add investor, because not every founder needs every investor adding value.

A seed-stage company raising from eight angels doesn't need eight people trying to shape their go-to-market strategy. A Series B company with forty employees and a competent leadership team doesn't need investors micromanaging their hiring process. What these companies often need most (for investors not leading round and taking board seats) is capital that comes without strings, or that can step up when called upon and needed.

This doesn't diminish the importance of truly value-add investors—we'll come back to that. But it's worth acknowledging that sometimes the most valuable thing an investor can provide is money, trust and speed.

The Scarcest Resource Isn't Capital

In the current environment, with thousands of angels and hundreds of funds deploying capital, money has become more commoditized in a way it wasn't a decade ago. For the best founders/companies, capital is readily available. What's scarce is founder time and attention.

Great founders are relentlessly focused on building their companies. They're managing product development, talking to customers, recruiting talent, and trying to maintain some semblance of life balance. Every hour spent managing investor relationships is an hour not spent on these core activities.

When an investor demands or requires more extensive involvement—frequent meetings, detailed updates, participation in strategic planning—they're making a withdrawal from the founder's most limited resource. If that involvement generates returns that exceed the time investment, everyone wins. But if it doesn't, or if the founder already has other investors providing similar value, the high-maintenance investor becomes a net negative regardless of their intentions.

I once spoke to a founder who described her cap table as having three categories of investors: 

1. the ones who help

2. the ones who don't get in the way

3. and the ones who create work.

She valued the first group enormously, but she was clear-eyed about the second group: "Honestly, the investors who just wire the money and respond to emails when they can help, they're great. I know exactly what I'm getting, and there's no overhead."

The Inverse Relationship Between Quality and Need 

Typically, the best founders need the least help.

Exceptional founders have strong visions, recruit well, understand their markets, and learn quickly. They're who every investor wants to back—and who need the least hand-holding or strategic guidance.

This creates an ironic dynamic. The companies investors most want are the ones that least need what investors can provide. These founders want capital and specific resources, not someone telling them how to run their business.

For investors, being friendly and low-friction can be a competitive advantage when competing for the best deals. When an exceptional founder chooses between similar investors, your reputation for being easy to work with might be the deciding factor.

This isn't about being passive—it's about being available without being demanding, helpful without being intrusive, moving quickly and highlighting how little involvement you are comfortable with. 

What "Friendly" Actually Means

Being a friendly investor doesn't mean being uninvolved or uninterested. It means:

• Respecting boundaries. If a founder says they have their go-to-market strategy figured out, you don't need to send them three more articles about PLG.

• Being responsive without being demanding. Answer emails promptly when founders reach out, but don't expect immediate responses to every message you send.

• Offering help without strings. Make introductions because they might be valuable, not because you want to be seen as valuable.

• Trusting founder judgment. You invested in these people because you believed in them. 

• Making updates easy. Don't demand custom reports or frequent meetings if the company sends regular investor updates.

• Being pleasant to interact with. This should be obvious, but: don't be condescending, don't interrupt, don't make it about you.

The best friendly investors I know are deeply engaged with their portfolios, but they engage on the founder's terms. They're available when needed but not intrusive when they're not. They provide input when asked but don't treat every conversation as an opportunity to demonstrate their expertise. They remember that this is the founder's company, not theirs.

The Long Game

There's also a selfish reason to be a friendly investor: reputation compounds.

Founders talk a lot and typically help other founders when it comes to VC/investor intros. They may also compare notes on investors, share term sheets, and ask each other who's actually helpful versus who's just a pain. In tight-knit startup ecosystems, your reputation as an investor spreads quickly for better or worse.

If you're known as someone who's easy to work with—who closes quickly, doesn't renegotiate terms, provides capital without drama, and is helpful when called upon but not intrusive otherwise—I strongly believe you'll see better deal flow. Founders will come to you directly more frequently. 

Conversely, if you're known as difficult—slow to close, prone to renegotiating, demanding of founder time, or unpleasant in interactions—you'll find yourself gradually frozen out of the best opportunities. Founders will accept your money if they need it, but they won't seek you out. 

Finding the Balance

The best investor approach is context-dependent. First-time founders or those in unfamiliar markets often need operational support, where deeply involved investors are invaluable. Specific challenges—complex sales process, difficult fundraising, strategic pivots—all warrant intensive help.

But many situations, often those of a syndicate, call for capital, trust, and space to execute. Great investors recognize which situation they're in and adjust accordingly. Sometimes letting founders pull value from you rather than pushing it onto them can be an ideal recipe for a portfolio founder. Be available and helpful, but let them set the terms of engagement.

Conclusion

The venture capital industry often celebrates the hands-on, deeply involved investor as the gold standard. But in an era where the best founders have abundant capital options and scarce time, being friendly and frictionless isn't just nice to have—it can be a strategic advantage that benefits everyone. Sometimes the most valuable thing you can do as an investor is provide capital, trust, and the space to let great founders build great companies.

If you enjoyed this article, feel free to view our prior posts on adjacent topics 

• How We Closed 14 SPVs in One Month

• Are VCs the New Bankers

• VC Scouts: Why Waiting for Lead Investors Maximizes Syndicate Success

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✍️ Written by Zachary and Alex